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Posts: 71
How do you deal with negativity?
Started by The Professor living-dead-girl 1 year ago
What do you do when people diss you for the things you love? How do you react to people trying to make you feel like crap for being different? People make fun of me for liking you and musicians like you all the time, and although i act like I don't care deep down I wish I didn't care, and I feel shallow for caring, if that makes any sense. So how do you act so cool all the time? -living-dead-girl

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Captain Spauldin Moon replied 1 year ago...

I can relate. I'll tell you the story about my ex roommate..I met him in 2000 at my community college, and we were friends until he moved out in 2009..I thought he was super cool, and I liked that he was a horror fan too. And, at first he was nice to me..Then, he kind started subtly doing and saying things that made me feel like I wasn't cool enough to hang out with him.I could write you a novel about all the things he did. He treated me like I was lucky he let me hang out with him, and this was at a time when I was already going through a lot of crap.Some pretty bad things had happened, and I really needed a friend, ( and I am embarrassed to admit this) and I thought he was a good friend and I just wasn't as cool as his other friends. So, I went out of my way to make him happy and try to show him I was cool.Well, in 2005, when The Devil's Rejects came out, I invited him and my best friend at the time to go see it with me..I thought he was going to like the movie as much as I did..Well, we went, and it turned out he was very, very offended by the movie..After we got out of the movie, he kind of pitched a fit about it, and then left..I really should have told him to fuck off then ( after all, it was nice of me to invite him and pay for his ticket and he was being a dick in return), but I just told myself that it wasn't a big deal..And, after that day, for years, he made fun of me every time he saw me for loving Rob Zombie..Every time..I pretended I didn't care, and it wasn't a big deal.. One day, the fucker even tried to wipe his snot on my Captain Spaulding hoody..When I was wearing it..And, the whole time, I just told myself it wasn't a big deal..He was just joking. That was the kind of sense of humor he had, and he was simply cooler than me. But,he really loved me as an adoptive sister, and all that shit.This went on for 3 years..Then, in 2008, I got my own apartment, and he ended up getting fired from his job and I was nice and let him move into the spare bedroom in my apartment..In a way, it was a good thing I did, because I started seeing what kind of person he really was over the next year. He treated me like I was his Mom, and evidently he has no respect for his mom..He had tons of issues he never let me know about, and had a pretty bad drug problem he managed to hide from me, until he basically had to admit to me what was going on, because his counselor figured out he was using meth, not just pot,so, he started going to a drug treatment program and Narcotics Anonymous.What really pissed me off was once he started those programs, and confessed about his issues and the drugs, he started using all of that as an excuse for every time he disrespected me, but by them I was pissed, and I was barely talking to him anymore. Yeah, I thought what he went through was too bad, but there was no excuse for how he had treated me all along.I was beginning to see who he really was, and I wasn't the only one. His disrespect for me was so bad, that one of his friend noticed, and they ended up fighting over it, and now that person is now my friend and he doesn't talk to my former roommate either. That is the only good that came out of this situation, I made friends with someone who really does care about other people.That, and the fact that I am not about to take that kind of shit from anyone anymore..I wish I punched him in the face every time he talked shit.Looking back, I am ashamed I put up with all that shit from my ex roommate..He treated me with no respect, he hit on all my female friends and may have been the reason my best friend and I are no longer friends..And, he had no reason to be talking all that shit about Rob Zombie..For one, it was not my fault he was offended by the violence in Rejects.Also, more importantly, I have the right to like anything I want..Regardless of whether or not my friends like it...I don't like everything my friends like, but I don't give them shit for it..There is no reason to..If the asshole was really my friend, he wouldn't have been giving me shit for the things I like. If you are getting a lot of shit all the time for the things you like, you are not shallow for caring. Maybe you have the kind of friends who don't treat you right..I know sometimes friends make fun of eachother for shits and giggles, and as long as you can make fun of them back, it is ok..But, when you can't do that to them, and they make fun of you all the time, it is not a good situation. Rob, if you are reading this, I just want to say thank you, because your music and movies helped me keep my sanity..There has been a lot of shit for me over the years with people I thought were my friends..If I didn't have anything to focus on except their bullshit, drama, and mind games I would have gone insane.


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Captain Spauldin Moon replied 1 year ago...

Living Dead Girl, basically, my advice is, if someone is making you feel like crap for the things you like,don't put up with it. Tell them to knock it off, and if they won't, get them out of your life. You deserve to be treated with respect.There are plenty of other people in the world, and you are a nice girl,you can find friends who don't try to make you feel like crap for liking the things you like.


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The Professor MoonShiNeQueeN replied 1 year ago...

you are whoever you say you are, be proud of your life and the things you love. there anger is jealously. live your life not others. you are an amazingly unique person smile

xxoo I dont know jack, but i do know shine xxoo

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Sylixia replied 1 year ago...

When someone takes the piss out of my makeup, my taste in music, my spiritual beliefs, or whatever, I just give them a withering look & tell them to mind their own fucking business. People who put down others for being different are just showing their own small-mindedness & insecurity. But yeah it's stll unpleasant.


Posts: 1816
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Captain Spauldin Moon replied 1 year ago...

Damn right, tell them to mind their own business. More people need to learn to do that..Certain people I know seem to let the opinions of other people control them. I feel like these individuals listen more to the people who are feeding them negative garbage about their appearances and life styles, than they do to me when I tell them they are attractive, a lot of people care about them, and that there is nothing wrong with the way they choose to live their lives...It is frustrating.


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ZombieTwitch replied 1 year ago...

I've dealt with people making fun of me for the better part of my life, and I usually just laugh at their idiotic, as well as childish behavior when they choose to insult me. In all truth I honestly don't give a shit about what they think of me because when someone makes fun of me, that's usually because they can't understand that I understand alot more about the world around me than they do. And when I said that I didn't mean to sound arrogant.


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ZombieTwitch replied 1 year ago...

People also make fun of what they don't understand.


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Captain Spauldin Emma replied 1 year ago...

Congratulations, Rob chose your question for this weeks QOTW. Read his answer here: http://robzombie.com/2012/04/qotw-how-do-you-deal-with-negativity-by-zombiehead-member-living-dead-girl/

Clients: Rob Zombie, John 5, Piggy D, Tommy Clufetos: see my work: http://www.facebook.com/1976designs

Posts: 1816
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Captain Spauldin Moon replied 1 year ago...

Congrats Living Dead Girl


Posts: 62
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The Professor MoonShiNeQueeN replied 1 year ago...

congrats

xxoo I dont know jack, but i do know shine xxoo

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Tiny msow replied 1 year ago...

Congrats on having your question answered! It's a very good one, which I can relate to. Also thank you to Rob, for giving such good advice.


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Sylixia replied 1 year ago...

Hey congrats Living Dead Girl! I think your question about negativity has probably affected all of us at some point in our lives. Know that you're not alone.


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